Protecting Yourself From Rejection?
This blog post is based on a TikTok video I recently stitched for my Shadow on Blast series that caught some traction.
What I shared in less than 90 seconds is going to be further explained with actionable steps below.
Grab Your Journal & Join Me
The belief that “guys only block girls they truly like” in the quote above is called a cognitive coping mechanism.
This is your mind’s way of dealing with challenges or stressors by changing how you think about them.
It's like using mental strategies to handle difficult situations or emotions, helping you feel better or manage your problems more effectively.
Keep in mind, that coping mechanisms are tools your mind uses to deal with tough situations or emotions. They're ways to help you feel better or handle problems.
Sometimes, these coping tools might not work well or even make things worse.
That's when they become maladaptive.
Maladaptive Coping Mechanisms
You know a coping mechanism has gone from helpful, to creating more problems with these four signs:
Denial: Constantly denying or avoiding problems instead of facing them can prevent you from addressing issues effectively.
Escapism: Using activities like excessive drinking, scrolling, or overeating to avoid dealing with problems can lead to further complications.
Rumination: Continuously dwelling on negative thoughts without actively trying to solve them can worsen mental health issues like anxiety or depression.
Catastrophizing: Exaggerating the negative aspects of a situation can increase stress and anxiety, making it harder to cope.
Why Hold onto this Belief?
It's a way to cope with rejection.
The belief that “guys only block girls they truly like” serves to protect your self-esteem and provide comfort by rationalizing the rejection.
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Your Fear of Rejection Shadow
The fear of rejection shadow involves an underlying belief that your worthiness is tied to how others perceive you or their acceptance of you. Symptoms of this shadow look like:
Avoidance
Perfectionism
Self-Criticism
Seeking Reassurance
Begin Healing Here
Write down your fear ('fear of rejection')
Write down 3 ways it makes you feel (forgotten, betrayed, lonely, etc).
Write down 3 of your learned habits based on this fear (people pleasing, seeking reassurance, clinginess, etc).
Write down 3 payoffs from your fear (easy, predictable, comfortable, controllable, etc).
By identifying and reflecting on these aspects of your fear of rejection, you can gain a deeper understanding of how it impacts your thoughts, emotions, and behaviors.
This increased awareness is an essential step towards healing and overcoming the fear of rejection shadow.
